|“||You know what your problem is? You want to think of yourself as the good guy. Well, I know you better than anyone, and I can tell you that you're not. In fact, you'd probably sleep a lot better at night if you just admitted to yourself that you're a selfish goddamn coward who just takes whatever he wants and doesn't give a shit about who he hurts. That's you. That's BoJack Horseman.||”|
Herb was an overweight human man with brown hair.
In the 1980s, he had shaggy hair and a beard and mustache. He wore an open green and orange plaid sport coat over a black shirt, green jeans, and dark blue, light blue, and white sneakers.
In the 1990s, Herb's hairline had receded. He was also a bit heavier. He wore a grey collared shirt with flowers on it, tan khakis, and light grey and green sneakers.
In the Early 2010s, after getting cancer, Herb was very skinny and had lost all of his hair due to cancer treatments. He wore a long-sleeved medium blue shirt, grey sweatpants, and white slippers. He also has an IV hooked up to his left arm.
During the days of Horsin' Around, Herb appeared to be a friendly, upbeat, and supportive person who did believe in everyone on board and did care for them.
He was fired from the show after he was involved in a public scandal and was revealed to be gay. BoJack had to stay on the show, figuring that he would be satisfying the millions of people watching. It didn't work out years later for BoJack since Herb felt it was a betrayal.
While Herb's personality hasn't changed drastically, he has grown deeply bitter towards BoJack. When BoJack comes to visit him, he keeps making jokes about how he stabbed him in the back.
He at first says that despite what happened in the past, it was nice to see him again. Unfortunately, when BoJack comes back to apologize, he is not giving BoJack any sympathy or sense of closure. He understandably says that the scars BoJack made were too deep to make better with an apology.
Herb was a stand-up comedian in the 1980s who would often perform at a bar in Los Angeles. He met a young comedian named BoJack Horseman while heckling him as he performed. He approached BoJack in the bar, who was initially upset and told him to "Get cancer, jerkwad."
This foreshadows Herb's rectal cancer later in life. Herb gave BoJack comedic advice, and the two became best friends. They both worked at the bar and performed together. Herb began dating a young doe named Charlotte Moore, whom BoJack also became close with.
In 1986, Herb pitched network executives his show Horsin' Around. Around the same time, Charlotte left for Maine, breaking up with Herb before this. She revealed this news to BoJack, saying she doesn't think she is the person that Herb is looking for.
The network picked up Horsin' Around, and Herb wanted BoJack to be the star of the show, an offer which BoJack accepted. Excited, Herb kissed BoJack, but they both clarified they weren't gay. Herb also gave BoJack a telescope.
The show went into production and premiered in 1987. It was initially dismissed as mediocre, but it gained a popular audience and was a huge success.
Herb developed healthy relationships with the three main human stars, Joelle Clarke, Bradley Hitler-Smith, and Sarah Lynn. However, his relationship with BoJack was strained as BoJack let fame go to his head, becoming narcissistic, alcoholic, and depressed.
In the early 1990s, Herb was caught having sexual relations with another male. He was widely criticized by the media, who then attempted to boycott Horsin' Around. Herb was worried about being fired and admitted his homosexuality to BoJack, and asked him, as a friend, to threaten to leave if he was fired. BoJack was unsure at first but decided to help Herb because Herb was responsible for his fame in the first place.
However, Angela Diaz convinced BoJack that Herb would understand if he really was his friend and that if BoJack did leave, he wouldn't be the star he dreamed of being. BoJack stayed on the show until its cancellation in 1996, not only betraying Herb but also cutting off contact with him entirely.
Herb was understandably upset, keeping in touch with Joelle and Sarah Lynn but never speaking to BoJack for twenty years after. He did many things in that time, including opening a charity and meeting president Bill Clinton. He even kept in touch with Charlotte. During the 2000s, he was diagnosed with rectal cancer.
In 2014, BoJack decided to speak to Herb after learning from Sarah Lynn that he had “ass cancer." BoJack later gets a phone call from Herb, angrily saying to come to Malibu, where he lives, because he'll be alive tomorrow, and that "after that, who knows."
BoJack travels to Malibu, California with Diane Nguyen, who was writing his biography. Todd Chavez also came along but didn't meet Herb because he was left to park the car and ended up in a subplot with two girls, referring to themselves as the Celebrity Stealing Club, who were stealing from celebrities.
Herb is actually somewhat glad to see his old friend, but understandably is still angry and took several jabs at BoJack, making "jokes" about BoJack stabbing him in the back all those years ago. BoJack later apologizes to Herb for what he did.
Herb doesn't forgive BoJack and goes on a rant about how BoJack has to live with what he did. Herb was mad, not because BoJack didn't leave the show, but because BoJack completely abandoned him, and he would never forgive him for that. He then commanded BoJack to "Get the fuck out of [his] house."
BoJack walks out, picking up the telescope Herb kept. Herb gets mad and attacks BoJack, ending up wrestling on the ground with him. The telescope ends up broken, a possible further symbol for the damaged friendship.
Herb then states, "You know what your problem is? You wanna think of yourself as the good guy. Well, I know you better than anyone else and I can tell you, that you're not. In fact, you'd probably sleep a lot better at night if you just admitted to yourself that you're a selfish goddamn coward, who takes whatever he wants, and doesn't give a shit about who he hurts. That's you. That's BoJack Horseman." BoJack claims he doesn't know why he came there, to which Herb replies "Yeah, you do."
In 2015, Herb overcomes his cancer but is killed soon after in a car accident. He didn't sustain injuries from the accident itself but had crashed into a truck filled with peanuts to which he was deathly allergic.
The episode of Still Broken revolves entirely around the funeral of Herb Kazzaz. Several people attend the funeral, including BoJack, Todd, Joelle, Sarah Lynn, Bradley, Henry Winkler, Mr. Peanutbutter, and Princess Carolyn. Henry used to volunteer with Herb at Habitat for Humanity.
Mr. Peanutbutter and Princess Carolyn didn't know Herb personally, but Mr. Peanutbutter is there to network. Princess Carolyn was there to network as well, wanting to make connections with Herb's famous and influential circle of friends but pretended to have known Herb. Mr. Peanutbutter, unknowingly, forces her to tell tales about her friendship with Herb which didn't exist. She lies about helping orphans with Herb and makes it sound as though they were best friends.
Henry gives Princess Carolyn Herb's ashes. Meanwhile, BoJack, Bradley, Sarah Lynn, and Joelle reconnect. They were all annoyed with one another, but when it is revealed Herb was writing a manuscript for a novel, they agree to look for it.
They eventually found out that Henry Winkler took it, not by any malicious intent, but simply because it was a horrible manuscript. He was hiding it because he didn't want Herb to become a laughingstock. As a way to be respectful to Herb's legacy, they agreed not to publish the book and conclude Herb's legacy was Horsin' Around.
In Sunk Cost and All That, one of the entries BoJack wrote on the whiteboard in reference to his past bad deeds was "Abandoned/wrestled Herb."
In Xerox of a Xerox, BoJack drives until he reaches The Laugh Shack. He walks up to a wall by the dumpster and sees an outline of his younger self drawn on the wall. When he steps inside of the outline.
The scene flashes back to a younger Herb and BoJack back in the 80s. Herb is tracing an outline of BoJack while he stands by the wall. BoJack states he is ready to never do stand up comedy again a
nd asks Herb if he'll put BoJack in his TV show. Herb reassures him that of course, he would, the network loves BoJack.
Herb goes on to tell him the network needs BoJack to do a screen test as a formality. BoJack questions why he has to do it and Herb asks if he thinks he's too good for it. BoJack says it's fine. Herb then tells BoJack to hold still so he can finish drawing the outline. He says BoJack may never get a star on the walk of fame or a wax statue, but this way, he'll be immortalized forever.
In Angela, there is a flashback from the 90s. Angela meets with Herb and tells him they are trying to sell the network to Disney. Herb then asks if Michael Eisner really cares about who he goes to bed with. Angela then tells him "We don't need to bring Eisner into this. Obviously, Michael Eisner is a compassionate and progressive individual. This isn't about him." Herb then tells Angela to tell him "you're fired" if he's fired. Angela then says Herb is fired, and that all they need is The Horse. Herb replies by saying if Angela wants BoJack to betray him, she's going to need a good pitch. Angela then says okay to this.
In The View from Halfway Down, In BoJack’s dream, he arrives at his mother’s house with a child Sarah Lynn and with a hydrangea plant in hand as a gift. A younger Beatrice invites them in and Beatrice announces BoJack’s arrival as Sarah Lynn runs into the living room. BoJack gives his mother the hydrangeas and she sarcastically thanks him. She puts the plant on the table as black tar starts dripping on the plant from the ceiling. Beatrice tells BoJack that he arrived just in time as a female Cardinal bird had flown in through the window and they’re having trouble getting her out of the house.
In the living room, the other dinner party guests are other people who have predeceased BoJack; Herb Kazzaz, Corduroy Jackson Jackson, and Crackerjack Sugarman. The other guests including Sarah Lynn are chasing around the bird trying to get her out of the house, seemingly while having fun while doing it.
Beatrice’s butler tells her someone is on the phone for her, and BoJack is surprised that Zach Braff is her butler. BoJack tries to explain to Beatrice who Zach Braff is but she simply asks “You mean my butler?” When Beatrice takes the phone call in the kitchen she tells BoJack to help with the bird. BoJack has a brief conversation with Herb who expresses joy at the fact BoJack came to the party. BoJack tells Herb that he kept having a recurring dream about having a dinner party with everyone who had died so he decided to do it for real.
Everyone is in the dining room and BoJack is sitting at the head of the table. Everyone is going around the table talking about the best and worst moments of their lives. Sarah Lynn, who has aged up to her eighteen-year-old self, says the best moment of her life was being asked for her autograph for the first time and since she was so young she didn’t know how to write her name so she just drew a squiggly line. While she’s talking, BoJack is given water. As Sarah Lynn describes giving autographs as being more of a chore after the first time, the house starts to rumble, and BoJack notices black tar forming a pool on the ceiling. When trying to stand up asking what the black tar is, Zach Braff sits BoJack back down and serves him a plate of pills.
Crackerjack says his best moment was when he enlisted in the army. As Crackerjack continues to talk, Beatrice asks BoJack if he’s ready to sing The Lollipop Song in the showcase, and BoJack tells Beatrice that he never makes it to the showcase. Crackerjack continues, saying he didn’t know that enlisting in the army would lead to the two worst moments of his life. Corduroy is surprised by this, saying that he didn’t know that they can pick two worst moments, while Herb tells Corduroy that it’s a conversation, not an assignment.
Corduroy then goes on to say that he has three worst moments of his life that he wants to share and Herb tells him that’s way too many. Zach Braff continues to serve everyone their dinners. Sarah Lynn is given a hamburger and fries, Herb is given peanuts, Corduroy, a lemon, Crackerjack, food rations, and Beatrice low-grade cafeteria food.
Crackerjack goes on to reveal that the two worst parts of his life were having to say goodbye to his mother and watching his general get shot in the face before that very same bullet hit Crackerjack in the head subsequently killing him, and Crackerjack moves his hair to reveal a bullet hole in his forehead. Herb tells Crackerjack that at least his death was instantaneous as Herb recalls the loud drips of his IV from when he had cancer. Suddenly the black tar on the ceiling starts dripping down on BoJack’s head.When asked about the best and worst parts of his life, BoJack says the worst part of his life was right before he found himself at the dinner party since he went to Angela Diaz’s house. He interrupts himself by taking a drink of water but he spits it out asking if anybody else has water that tastes like chlorine and asks Zach Braff for different water. Corduroy asks Crackerjack if he believes his death meant something since it was for a greater cause. Crackerjack says that question is too big for someone like him to answer, while Beatrice tells Corduroy that Crackerjack’s death did mean something saying that her brother gave the ultimate sacrifice. BoJack says that when people valorize the idea of sacrifice, loss, and suffering people tend to internalize the idea that being happy is selfish but sacrifice doesn’t mean anything. Herb says that if they talk about everyone’s whole life then they are going to be at the table all night trying to steer the conversation back to the original point. Sarah Lynn says that the worst part of her life was the 2007 “Sexually Confident Virgin Tour." She goes on to explain that her manager had leaked nude pictures of her on the internet to get more tour dates added and her mom pointed out every carb she ever ate, but it gave millions of fans a show they won’t ever forget.
As Sarah Lynn continues to talk, the black tar continues to drip on BoJack’s head. Corduroy tells Sarah Lynn that her exploits as a pop star were just a high she chased, saying that it doesn’t compare to Crackerjack’s time in the military, the comparison making Crackerjack visibly uncomfortable. Sarah Lynn turns to Herb hoping that he would back her up. Herb says that he used to believe that the work he did and the joy he brought meant something, saying that he was so close to winning an Emmy before he lost it all.
As the black tar continues to drip, BoJack asks if anyone is noticing the leak. Beatrice says that they’ll get a bucket but since the tar is falling on BoJack he’s going to have to hold the bucket. Herb continues, saying that when he got fired from Horsin’ Around he was able to become his true authentic self being out of the closet as a gay man in the 90s. Sarah Lynn questions what does being authentic has to do with anything. Herb then explains that when he was not hiding behind a façade he was able to be at peace with himself which is when he decided to get into philanthropy.
When Corduroy asked if he could ask Herb something, Herb pokes fun at the fact that Corduroy is asking Herb if he can ask him a question, and BoJack jumps in much to the annoyance of everyone except Crackerjack. Corduroy asks if Herb really got pleasure out of his charity work, and Herb says his philanthropy dwarfed every other joy in his life. Corduroy then goes on to say that it doesn’t count then since he got pleasure out of it then it wasn’t a selfless act, and good deeds are only good if it’s selfless.
As Corduroy talks, Sarah Lynn continues drinking her soda while BoJack plays with the pills on his plate. Herb asks who made that rule up saying that he helped people also going on to ask who cares if it made him feel good. Corduroy then goes on to say that feeling good is inherently selfish. Corduroy then goes on to mention Christ before being interrupted by Beatrice who tells him that she doesn’t appreciate the talk of religion in her house. Corduroy continues, saying that he was constantly trying to feel good and always looking for maximum pleasure, and that was one of the worst parts of his life.
Beatrice‘s husband walks in. Although Beatrice was married to Butterscotch Horseman, her husband takes the form of BoJack’s childhood hero Secretariat. Beatrice passive aggressively tells Secretariat that he didn’t miss anything and she asks him why shouldn’t they just bend themselves to his schedule. Secretariat gets annoyed saying that he had already apologized for being late and that he had been running. Secretariat and Beatrice get into a brief argument before settling back into their seats. Secretariat is presented with two sunny side up eggs, coffee, and alcohol.
Herb tells Secretariat that they’re playing the best part/the worst part. Herb says that the best part of his life was doing work in Machu Picchu. He confesses that after he was fired off of Horsin’ Around he thought about killing himself much to BoJack’s dismay. Herb says that he didn’t because the Knicks were having a good season and he wanted to see how the year ended for them. BoJack is surprised, asking Herb what he would’ve done had the Knicks not been having a good season and Herb says he would’ve just switched to baseball. Secretariat admonishes Herb for his lack of follow-through, saying that Herb wasn’t serious about killing himself. Herb goes on to say that he was glad that he didn’t and that when he was in Machu Picchu he realized that there was so much more he could be doing with his life.
As Secretariat continues by admiring the view while he was standing on the bridge moments before he jumped, BoJack spits black tar out onto the table much to everyone’s amusement. He says it must’ve come from swimming earlier. As he tries to remember when he went swimming, Secretariat tells BoJack not to think about it and asks him what the best part of his life was. BoJack says the best part of his life was when he took a teaching job at Wesleyan University in the drama department and he helped a student work through a scene he was having trouble with. BoJack goes on to explain that the reason that moment was special to him is it felt good to help someone do something, and he liked it because it reminded him of when he was younger and first starting out in the acting business. BoJack tells Herb that it also reminded him of when the two of them did stand-up at comedy clubs, and that might’ve been the best time of his life. As dinner concludes Beatrice asks if they’re ready to start the show.
Everyone leaves for the theater in the other room, and BoJack says goodbye to everyone. When Sarah Lynn asks if BoJack is coming, BoJack tells Sarah Lynn that this is the part in the dream where he normally wakes up. Sarah Lynn follows the others into the theater saying that maybe BoJack would be able to come to the showcase next time. Zach Braff reaches over and grabs BoJack’s plate before walking off. Much to BoJack’s confusion he’s still in the dream and hasn’t woken up yet.
As BoJack has not woken up from the dream yet he decides to go to the showcase which is hosted by Herb. Herb introduces the opening act which is Sarah Lynn. Before her performance, Sarah Lynn decides to dedicate her performance to BoJack. When the Spotlight shifts to BoJack he proceeds to apologize for everything that happened to Sarah Lynn but she interrupts him before going back to the piano to start her song. Sarah Lynn starts to play Don’t Stop Dancing ‘Til The Curtains Call which quickly transitions into a song to the tune of her song Prickly Muffin. Towards the end, the song transitions back to Don’t Stop Dancing ‘Til The Curtain Call. Suddenly a door frame appears and Sarah Lynn walks towards it. As she finishes the song the door opens revealing nothing but darkness.
As she repeats the last two lines of the song twice more “Don’t stop dancing," she holds her breath and falls backward into the darkness behind the door frame and vanishes completely. BoJack runs to the door looking for Sarah Lynn but she’s gone and Herb introduces Corduroy’s aerial act. While Corduroy performs his piece BoJack tries to ask Herb where does the door lead. Herb tells him that he should sit down and he’ll get a chance to perform. Before they can finish the conversation, Corduroy swings himself into the door frame and disappears into the darkness. BoJack sits back down next to Secretariat and Herb introduces Zach Braff. Shortly thereafter, BoJack leaves with Secretariat to smoke.
BoJack and Secretariat walk outside onto a bridge, the same bridge Secretariat jumped off of when he committed suicide. BoJack asks Secretariat what is behind the door and Secretariat ignores the question entirely and expresses annoyance towards Herb, saying that he doesn’t believe that Herb truly found peace when he was in Machu Picchu. BoJack says that he believes Herb but Secretariat assures BoJack that every single person in the theater would go back and live their lives over if they could. He says that peace is someone trying to convince themselves that life has meaning or purpose, and if you do everything the right way then there’s a parting gift at the end.
Zach Braff is about to perform his roller skate routine when BoJack bursts in and tells him to stop the show, asking what is going on. Zach Braff tells BoJack that he’s being rude and he’s about to perform form his rollerskating routine. Secretariat and Zach try to get BoJack to calm down, and Zach tries to get BoJack to sit down put BoJack pushes Zach backward and Zach slowly slides towards the open door. As he’s sliding towards the door, Zach expresses regret for all the things he didn’t get to do such as direct his “Backdraft” remake “Zach Braff’s Backdraft," finish his memoir “I Started A Zach Which Started The Whole World Braffing," or license Zach Braff short stack breakfast attack at Shake shack.
Before he finishes he falls backward into the door frame and disappears into the darkness. As BoJack continues to panic, he asks Herb how he got there and Herb replies “How the hell should I know?“ BoJack tries retracing his steps, recalling that he broke into his old house, he was watching the Horsin’ Around Blu-ray, and he drank and took some pills and then he went swimming. Just then the image of BoJack‘s body floating in the pool appears on the ceiling of the theater. Then BoJack remembers he got out of the pool and called Diane. Herb tries to tell BoJack that they’re trying to do a show.
However, BoJack continues to retrace his steps saying that he called Diane and he couldn’t have drowned in the pool if he had gotten out of the pool to call Diane. BoJack wants to finish his conversation with Diane and tries to leave the room to find a phone but the exit disappears. As BoJack continues to panic, Herb invites Secretariat to the stage. Crackerjack tries to calm BoJack down and guides him back to his seat saying that freaking out isn’t going to change anything, while Beatrice tells BoJack that something like this was bound to happen to him sooner or later.
Secretariat takes the stage and starts reading his poem “The View From Halfway Down." When he’s partway through, the spotlight reveals the open door behind Secretariat, but Secretariat assures the audience that he’s not finished yet. When he gets to the part of his poem where he starts expressing regret for committing suicide in the first place, Secretariat starts to panic and the door inches its way closer to him. Secretariat continues to panic saying he's changed his mind as Herb tries to console him. As Secretariat regrets not admiring the view from halfway down after he jumped off the bridge he stumbles backward and falls through the door frame and disappears into the darkness.
BoJack panics and tries to run through the exit, which had reappeared, but he ends up on stage instead. Crackerjack, bleeding through the bullet wound in his forehead, tells BoJack that nothing he does it is going to matter, while a slightly aged Beatrice tells BoJack that all his screaming and struggling isn’t going to pull his body out of the pool and Herb tells BoJack he needs to sit down. Herb tells BoJack that there’s a possibility that somebody’s going to find him and save him and there’s also a possibility that someo
ne won’t. BoJack asks Herb if anyone’s ever come back from “this place," and Herb tells BoJack there is no “place," his brain is just going through what it feels like it needs to go through and all he can do now is sit back and enjoy the show.
Herb returns to the stage and introduces Beatrice Horseman and Crackerjack Sugarman. Crackerjack starts to play I Will Always Think of You on the trumpet while Beatrice starts to dance. Partly through her dance, Beatrice starts dancing with a ribbon baton and jumps into the audience. Towards the end of her dance, Beatrice manages to suspend her self in the air while spinning and her ribbon gets longer. Crackerjack stops playing the trumpet although the music keeps going while his trumpet is suspended in the air. Beatrice wraps herself in the ribbon as she keeps spinning and Crackerjack ties the end of the ribbon to his waist and jumps into the door frame and disappears. As Beatrice keeps spinning black tar reaches out from the door frame and consumes Beatrice and she vanishes too. Just then Beatrice’s ribbon falls to the ground as does Crackerjack’s trumpet and the music stops.
Herb then goes on to introduce BoJack describing him as “The star of ‘Horsin’ Around’ and ‘The BoJack Horseman Show’! ‘Philbert’! ‘Secretariat’! The upcoming ‘Horny Unicorn’! Son of Butterscotch and Beatrice! Husband to no one! Father to none, that we know of! Standup comedian, actor, crippling alcoholic! A talented charmer and a stupid piece of shit.” BoJack then takes the stage and approaches the open door and asks if it’s terrifying. Herb says that he doesn’t think it’s scary saying that everything must come to an end at some point. BoJack says that he’ll see Herb on the other side. As Herb is consumed by the black tar that starts to leak from inside the door, he says "Oh BoJack, there is no other side, this is it" , before vanishing. This the last on-screen appearance of Herb Kazzaz
BoJack states that he needs to make a phone call before running out of the theater and through the dining room. As he runs through the dining room on the dining table he hears indistinct chatter as he’s being chased by the black tar. He runs to the living room and tries to bolt to the exit but the hydrangea plant he had given his mother earlier had mutated and blocked the door.
- When BoJack first meets Herb, he tells him "Get cancer, jerkwad!" Later on, Herb gets terminal rectal cancer.
- Herb's closet homosexuality is hinted at by Charlotte's statement "I don't think I'm the person Herb's looking for," a mere scene before Herb steals a kiss from BoJack at Griffith Park Observatory.
- It is possible Herb was bisexual, as he dated Charlotte, although that could have been a cover to throw people off or he was unsure of his sexuality at the time.
- In Sabrina's Christmas Wish, it is also shown that Herb does the voice of Mr. Liberatore, The Horse's boss in the sitcom Horsin' Around.
- As revealed in The View from Halfway Down, Herb became suicidal shortly after being fired from Horsin' Around, although this may be false, due to him having no plan to go through with it.
- In The View From Halfway Down, during the dinner, Zach Braff serves Herb a can of peanuts. Since everyone's meals are what they ate or encountered right before they died, Herb is served peanuts due to his fatal peanut allergy, which caused him to die after he hit a truck full of peanuts
- Herb is the first of five characters to use the word "fuck." The other four are Charlotte in Season 2, Todd in Season 3, BoJack himself (he planned to say it to Beatrice) in Season 4, Gina in Season 5, and Gina's Co-star in Season 6. The writers have a rule which is that this word can be used only once per season and only when a character's relationship with BoJack is permanently ruined.
- Out of the five ruined relationships, only the one between Todd and BoJack appears to have a chance of improving, as BoJack is among the first few people to whom Todd willingly discloses his asexuality.