|“||Don't tell me what to spread. I'll spread whatever I want. It's called one of the amendments.||”|
—Cardigan Burke, Hank After Dark
Cardigan Burke is a middle-aged human woman with tan skin and dark brown layered hair that is above-the-shoulder length with caramel highlights, slight wrinkles on her face, and thin eyebrows. She has a prominent jawline.
She is seen in a navy short-sleeved shirt with yellow trim and wears heavy blue eye-shadow and dark pink lipstick. She wears a grey bangle on her right wrist.
Cardigan appears to be a heavily opinionated woman. Little else is known about her.
This was after Diane, Princess Carolyn, and BoJack went on a book tour to promote the paperback edition of One Trick Pony. This was due to filming on Secretariat being put on hiatus because someone died. Also, Diane made controversial statements about Hank Hippopopalous.
In Juneau, Alaska, BoJack and Diane were at a QandA for One Trick Pony. One guy tries to ask him a debatable question, about Israel's government and how the US should get involved, but BoJack actually answers it in a way that pleases both sides.
Someone has a question for Diane, asking if she was worried that the book would ruin BoJack's reputation, which BoJack also wants an answer to. Diane says she thinks the truth is worth pursuing, no matter what, and many other celebrities have done far worse and they still have careers. She begins to list of celebrities, including Hank Hippopopalous.
Someone in the audience cuts her off when she brings up Hank, asking what she means by that. Diane states that all his former assistants made the same accusations against him, while BoJack tries to change the subject to him as he knows this could get controversial, and that said accusations are just a Google search away. Everyone in the audience does this and are shocked.
Later, Cardigan Burke, the sociologist on MSNBSea, dismisses these allegations, and is offended Diane would imply something like that on "a national treasure."
Diane is then seen on the news arguing with Cardigan and Tom, as BoJack tries to divert attention to himself. Cardigan asks what she has against Hank, as he seems like a "nice guy."
Diane explains that's the problem, everyone loves him, so they don't want to believe he's capable of doing anything bad.
Tom counters that they don't know for certain if these accusations are true, but Diane argues back it was "eight different women" who all said the same thing, although Tom believes not enough is known about those women to actually trust their accusations. Diane angrily tells Tom he's a journalist and won't tell his audience the truth.
In Burbank, Diane waits in a parking garage. A black car pulls up, and a female bird comes out of the driver's side. She confirms she is Nicole when Diane asks her. Diane gets a tape recorder and notepad out, but as soon as she does Hank gets out of the car and introduces himself. He thanks Nicole with a wicked grin and walks up to Diane.
Hank tells Diane he didn't do anything and turns off the tape recorder. He then tells her he isn't scared of her, in fact, he's doing this as a favor to her, because he's not a bad guy and in twenty-four hours the media will move on to some other big story, and he'll continue his shows that employ many people.
Hank tells Diane at this point, she's done, and if she keeps this up, she drags down people close to her. As he leaves, Diane, still not intimidated by him, says she knows who he is. Hank replies "Sweetheart, everyone knows who I am. I'm Hank Hippopopalous. Who the hell are you?"
Back in New York, despite not getting anything, Diane is still determined to bring Hank down. However, Amanda Hannity says she's cutting the story, as the owners of Manatee Fair and she doesn't think it's a good time, although Diane angrily points out the same people who own Manatee Fair also own MBN, the channel Hank is on.
Diane sits in the airport as she waits to leave for Cordovia. She sees Hank being interviewed by Tom Jumbo-Grumbo on the TV. Tom asks Hank if he did what the allegations claim, to which Hank simply replies "No, I did not." Tom states that’s good enough for him, and then announces the big story that Kanye West claims to hate Thin Mints. Diane looks down by everything that’s happened. A man sitting next to her tells her to smile, which makes her more upset.
She makes a cameo in See Mr. Peanutbutter Run.