Todd shows up in BoJack's room on Christmas morning clanging on a pot with a candy cane singing, "Joy to the world, Todd is here. He drank up all your beer." Which causes BoJack to groan from his bed in annoyance.
Todd then asks BoJack if he startled him with "cheer and good will towards man." BoJack sarcastically retorts that he had a terrible dream, that Todd was a person who existed, and then was in his room for some reason—and disturbing his sleep. He then expresses annoyance at realizing it was true.
Todd then questions if BoJack knows what day it is. BoJack asks if it's the anniversary of the day he's supposed to tell Todd how annoying he is. Todd says no, that is July 14 which is also Bastille Day. BoJack then mutters once again under his breath how annoying Todd is. Todd then excitedly opens the blinds in BoJack's room and exclaims that it's Christmas Day.
BoJack then tells Todd not to get too excited, because he did not buy Todd a Christmas present. To which Todd says he stole BoJack's credit card, to buy himself a yellow beanie as his Christmas present from BoJack, that looks identical to his old one—because that is favorite type of hat.
BoJack then asks Todd to leave, as their Christmas transaction for the year is complete, to which Todd replies they could watch the very special Christmas episode of Horsin' Around titled Sabrina's Christmas Wish. In that episode his youngest adopted daughter Sabrina, upon discovering Santa's existence, decides to wish for her parents to be alive again.
BoJack says, despite the fact he loves Horsin' Around, he usually skips the Christmas episodes. Todd asks, "if it's because the themes of family and togetherness remind [BoJack] of his own isolation?" BoJack responds it's because of, "cynical cash grabs by greedy corporations looking to squeeze a few extra Nielsen points out of sentimental claptrap for mush-brained idiots who'd rather spend their Christmas watching a fake family on TV than actually trying to have a conversation with their own dumb families."
To which Todd replies, he likes seeing people on TV hug each other.
BoJack then says if Todd will shut up they can watch the episode together. Also, he gets a residual check every time someone watches an episode.
The episode then starts in the kitchen with Olivia making chocolate chip pancakes, eggs, and hash browns for breakfast. The Horse then asks, "Who are you and what have you done with Olivia?" Olivia then says her ulterior motive was the cute leather jacket she likes is on sale at the galleria. To which Ethan replies, "I gotta say, I've never understood the appeal of fashionable clothing." To which Olivia replies, "um, that's the understatement of the century." To which Ethan replies all he wants is a sensible pair of socks to "keep his tootsies toasty" for years to come.
The Horse then asks the kids, if they have ever heard that it's better to give than to receive. Olivia then replies "Well, by that logic, isn't giving you the opportunity to give me a leather jacket really the best gift of all?" The Horse then says, "Well, I've heard of a one jacket mind, but this is ridiculous." BoJack in present-day questions what a one jacket mind is. Olivia then says, "I just want to look good when I'm on the back of Joey Saratoga's motorcycle. Besides, I've never had a Christmas before and I want to make sure this one's really special."
The Horse then questions if the kids had ever had a Christmas at the orphanage. Sabrina walks in then questions what a Christmas is. To which The Horse replies, "it's the most magical time of year." The Horse then starts talking about Christmas carols, hanging up stockings, and Santa Clause. Sabrina then questions what a Santa Clause is. The Horse then tells Sabrina, Santa is an old man who gives gifts to all the good boys and girls. Sabrina gets excited over the idea of getting presents for being good and says her famous catchphrase, "that's too much man."
Some random guy in the live audience yells out that Sabrina's catchphrase is his favorite line. He then gets excited when she says it again.
The Horse then tells the kids he vows will make it the best Christmas ever for them.
The Horse then shows up at his place of work, Liberatore and Associates, INC to try to work early so he can spend time with the kids on Christmas. Tracy, the secretary questions if the orphans are making The Horse go soft, to which The Horse replies he's still the top earner at the firm. Tracy then says she will buzz Mr. Liberatore and let him know The Horse is in.
Tracy then says Mr. Liberatore wanted to check your progress on the Manzanita briefs. The Horse and Tracy then start flirting with each other. Someone from the live audience then tells The Horse to kiss her.
The Horse then complains about Mr. Liberatore making him come in on Christmas. He then says, "You know, he has got to be the meanest, snootiest, penny-pinchingest and he's right behind me, isn't he?" Tracy tries to motion for The Horse to stop talking. The Horse then asks if Liberatore is behind him.
To which Liberatore replies, "actually, I'm listening over the intercom. Oh! I can't say I'm not disappointed. Time was, I thought you were a go-getter." To which The Horse protests, "Hey, I go, I get."
Liberatore then says, "ever since those orphans moved in, you've become awfully distracted. If you want to be made partner, you'll have to show some initiative. You know, Jacob Goldstein's coming in on Christmas." The Horse replies that Jacob Goldstein's Jewish! Liberatore then says, "The boys at the country club are not gonna like that. Anyway, you can spend Christmas morning with your little tater tots, but I want you in here by the afternoon. Remember, this is your career we're talking about." To which The Horse sighs sadly to.
Meanwhile, at the Horse's house Ethan and Olivia both comment on how it's too quiet, while they are sitting on the couch reading magazines. Suddenly, Goober walks in wearing a Santa suit and sunglasses. He then says he is there to bring "holiday cheer into their dull lives" as he was invited by The Horse himself. He then flirts with Olivia, asks her to kiss him under the mistletoe, and she rejects him.
The Horse then asks Sabrina if she is ready for the surprise. She then makes a comment about a tree being inside the house. He tells her that's not all. She then sees Goober and tells him to go home. The Horse then tells her it's not Goober, but Santa. Sabrina then complains she recognizes his cologne, as he reeks of it.
Todd in present-day makes a comment about that being "classic Goober." BoJack then tells him to stop talking. BoJack then questions, "why they have to watch cheesy Christmas specials at all?" Todd says it's because of tradition. Todd then makes a comment about how he still can't believe Goober molested all those Laker girls to which BoJack replies it wasn't Goober but the actor who portrays him.
On screen, Goober tells Sabrina he is actually Santa's helper, and she can ask for anything. Sabrina then says, she wants a set of personalized pencils with her name on them, because at the orphanage she always had to share. The Horse asks her to think bigger, she then says she wants a Pretty Pony Princess Play-Set. The Horse tells her now she is talking, and encourages her to ask for whatever she wishes for.
She then says she wishes for her mommy and daddy. The Horse gets a heartbroken look on his face, and Todd tells BoJack he is a really good actor. BoJack then questions, if Todd will keep interrupting every five minutes. If so, he would ask Tod to leave. Todd then asks if he really wants to spend Christmas by himself.
Todd, then goes on to say no one should be alone on Christmas. He then says, "did we learn nothing from John McClane in Die Hard?" BoJack then responds with, "John McClane was alone on Christmas, that's how he saved the day."
Todd then goes on to say, "He wasn't alone, he had that cop helping him, the dad from Family Matters." BoJack then says, "that wasn't the dad from Family Matters, it was just the same actor." Todd then replies with, "I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be the same character—they're both cops." BoJack then responds with, "Yeah, but one was a cop in Los Angeles—and the other was a cop in Chicago." Todd then brings up a conspiracy theory that the character could have been in the Witness Protection Program. This causes BoJack to groan into his pillow in frustration.
Back in the episode, The Horse gets a call from Mr. Liberatore, asking him to come to work. Olivia makes a comment about The Horse working on Christmas Day being a bummer because he can't spend time with the family. The Horse then says they could spend more time together. For instance, he could chaperone Olivia's prom. Sabrina then comes in from shoveling the walk, saying she's trying to do good deeds, so Santa grants her wishes.
The Horse tries to explain to her, that there are some things even Santa can't do, like bring her parents back. Sabrina then translates this, into The Horse is trying to make her think it won't happen, so she'll be even more surprised when it comes true.
Olivia then suggests they trick Sabrina into acting bad, so she'll believe her parents not coming is her own fault, she'll act good for a whole year—and she'll still believe in Santa. The Horse then tells Sabrina to guard the cookies for Santa.
The episode then cuts to Christmas morning. Joelle gets a helmet to ride on the motorcycle, Ethan gets his holiday socks, and Sabrina gets the play set but is disappointed her parents did not show up. She does get a letter from her parents in heaven, saying that they are proud of her. Sabrina storms up the stairs, sobbing as that is not what she asked for, saying she hates The Horse and Christmas.
Ethan asks if it was something he said. Todd then asks why would it be something Ethan said. BoJack explains that's the joke.
On screen, The Horse goes to Sabrina's room to talk to her. Sabrina questions, "why Santa wouldn't want [her] to be happy?" The Horse says he is sure he does want her to be happy. She says she tried to do everything right to make her wish happen, and doesn't understand why it didn't work. Sabrina then questions if making others miserable is how Santa gets his kicks.
The Horse panics and explains to her Santa isn't real, but a lie made up by grown-ups to get kids to act good, but you need to act good all the time—not just because Santa says so. He then tells her he is glad her parents aren't alive—so he can be apart of her, Ethan, and Olivia's lives. Sabrina finally says she is too. She then runs off, to show Ethan and Olivia her new pencils, that have her name on them.
The Horse then calls Liberatore and explains he is not coming in on Christmas Day because he would rather spend time with family. Liberatore says the phone call took guts and offers him a promotion and a partnership. The Horse then says he will spend the Holidays with the people he loves.
Sabrina is seen playing downstairs with her gifts. Olivia questions how The Horse made her come down he says he made her an offer she couldn't refuse. Olivia says she was impressed The Horse wrote that letter from her parents. The Horse says he didn't write it and Olivia and Ethan both claim they didn't write it. The Horse questions, "if none of them wrote it, who did?"
The camera then pans to the star on the tree and a,"ho, ho, ho Merry Christmas" can be heard. The title card reads "Merry Christmas From Horsin' Around."
The ending brings much confusion to Todd. An initially skeptical BoJack suggests they watch the series' eight other Christmas specials.
|Will Arnett||...||BoJack Horseman|
|Aaron Paul||...||Todd Chavez|
|Raphael Bob-Waksberg||...||Loud Audience Member|
|Stanley Tucci||...||Herb Kazzaz|
- Herb Kazzaz voices The Horse's boss in the episode of Horsin' Around.
- The "Boxer Vs. Raptor" vanity plate in this episode is replaced with one for "All That Kazzaz Productions," presumably because Herb's production company exists in-universe. The logo features a caricature of Herb and an audio clip of his voice saying "It's a Kazzaz-strophe!"