|“||Are you embarrassed of me because I’m a has-been? Because you know that I’m writing that book that is going to make everybody love me again!||”|
The clip is shown as part of an introduction from Charlie Rose, who notes that while Horsin' Around wasn’t a critical hit, as it was dismissed as a cliched, schmaltzy sitcom, it was beloved by general audiences and ran for nine years. Charlie introduces his guest, BoJack Horseman, eighteen years after his hit sitcom Horsin' Around ended, focusing on his life.
BoJack begins the interview revealing he parked in a handicap spot and is drunk, then non-coherently defends Horsin' Around, saying life is "one, long hard kick in the urethra" and at the end of a hard day people just want to watch a show about good, likable people where every problem gets resolved in thirty minutes.
At the mention of real life, Charlie asks what he has done significantly since the cancellation of the show, but BoJack is at a loss for words.
Later, BoJack is walking around in his house, his roommate Todd is watching The Maury Show. As BoJack is walking, Todd greets him and BoJack responds in a very monotonous tone. Todd responds with "Why so gloomy, roomie?" BoJack tells Todd that he is not his roomie, instead, he is merely a house-guest as he doesn't pay rent and sleeps on his couch. BoJack elaborates his annoyance, saying that he's had tapeworms that were less parasitic.
BoJack questions why he's been letting Todd live there for the past five years rent-free, and Todd responds by saying that his parents kicked him out and he had nowhere to go, so one day he just crashed BoJack's party and he had been living with him ever since. BoJack retorts that he thought Todd was kicked out for his "alternative lifestyle," meaning he was a troubled gay teen not realizing Todd simply meant he was lazy. Todd then tells him that's on him for making assumptions.
He meets with publisher Pinky Penguin at Silver Spoon Diner, regarding his upcoming book.
Pinky, who’s publishing company is on its last legs due to print media falling into obscurity, and tells BoJack he keeps missing his deadlines, furthered by a cutaway where we see BoJack not make any progress besides recording himself say the title, and they need a best seller so they don’t go bankrupt.
Pinky recommends him to hire a ghost-writer, but BoJack harshly declines the offer and tells Pinky to give him one more week.
One week later, BoJack has still made no progress on his novel, and ignores Pinky's call. He is seen in his pajamas watching episodes of Horsin' Around, while binge-drinking and eating. Todd asks him if this is in part due to Princess Carolyn dumping him the previous night
There is then a cut to ten hours earlier at Elefante. Princess Carolyn dumps him because of his fears of commitment, as he doesn’t even want to have a baby with her. All the while BoJack is acting inattentive and then defensive, even revealing he recently had sex with actress Emily Mortimer, which further shows how little weight their relationship holds to him.
Mr. Peanutbutter notices the two of them and interrupts their breakup, exclaiming “BoJack Horseman and Mr. Peanutbutter in the same room! What is this, a crossover episode?," much to BoJack's chagrin.
BoJack gets upset about having to pay $10.00 for the nine bread baskets he ate. Princess Carolyn then demands BoJack to take her home.
In the present, where Todd encourages BoJack to meet his ghostwriter by throwing a party, with the dual intent of making the party a quinceañera for a drug cartel lord's daughter to repay a debt—unbeknownst to BoJack.
BoJack questions Todd on who told him that he and Princess Carolyn broke up. Todd then gestures towards Princess Carolyn and says she did. Princess Carolyn walks over to where Todd and BoJack are sitting and says BoJack never took her home, calling him a jerk. BoJack sarcastically says everything is his fault and Princess Carolyn sternly tells him once again to take her home.
There is then another cut to BoJack and Princess Carolyn in the car. Princess Carolyn then tells BoJack it's the last time he will see her face. Cutting her off in mid-sentence, he lets her out of the car while it's still moving. Princess Carolyn ducks and rolls and lands on the sidewalk. Princess Carolyn then calls BoJack as his agent, not his girlfriend. She tells him she has the ability to separate her professional life from her personal life.
Princess Carolyn then tells BoJack that Penguin wants an update on the book he's pretending to write. Princess Carolyn then asks if he wants an appointment on Tuesday which BoJack reluctantly agrees to.
There is then a cut to BoJack's meeting with Pinky at Penguin Publishing. Pinky gets upset that BoJack doesn't have anything and says the company is in dire straits. He then tells BoJack they are tired of waiting and are hiring him a ghostwriter. Pinky then hands BoJack a business card with the name Diane Nguyen on it. Pinky then says Diane is great and she has a thing for horses. Pinky then hands BoJack a copy of Secretariat: a Life, which was ghostwritten by Diane. BoJack then says he always wanted to play Secretariat in a film.
Pinky then tells BoJack to give Diane a call and tell her that.
At home, BoJack vents to Todd about being a failure and not being able to start his book. Todd then reassures him he has an amazing story to tell and he should relax. BoJack then tells Todd he has never had a day of stress in his life and that is easy for him to say. There is then a flashback to Todd's run-in with a Mexican drug cartel.
BoJack then says he wants people to like him and Todd questions this. BoJack questions if people don't like him and Todd struggles to answer. Princess Carolyn who is in the kitchen asks why BoJack doesn't just have that lady write the book for him and be done with it. Princess Carolyn reveals they had sex the night before and she is now making breakfast.
Todd then suggests BoJack meets his ghostwriter at the party. BoJack then questions what party and why Todd is so obsessed with throwing a party all of a sudden. There is then another flashback where the leader of the drug cartel tells Todd he owes him a place to throw his daughter's quinceañera. Todd then simply responds to BoJack's question by saying parties are fun.
Princess Carolyn then asks BoJack if the book is so important to him why hasn't he worked on it in a year in a half. BoJack then says the book is his legacy and everyone thinks of him as this washed-up hack. BoJack then suffers a mild anxiety attack when he explains his fear of an unsuccessful memoir dooming him from becoming relevant in the public's eyes again. He is hospitalized shortly after.
BoJack is seen watching the pilot episode of Horsin' Around in the hospital and Todd questions if he takes the Horsin' Around DVDs with him everywhere he goes. Princess Carolyn then says she has meetings with her other clients. Princess Carolyn is silent and BoJack tells her that her silence speaks volumes. In a sing-song voice, she replies that was her intention.
The doctor then comes in, tells BoJack he suffered from a mild anxiety attack, and that he needs BoJack to take it easy. Princess Carolyn then retorts that all BoJack ever does is take it easy, and he doesn't even have any real responsibilities or a job. BoJack then solemnly tells the doctor he can try. Todd then again suggests they have the party and he can meet the ghostwriter. BoJack finally gives in and says they can throw the party.
When BoJack finally throws his party/quinceañera. BoJack is eating cotton candy when he questions Todd on who are all these people. Todd avoids the question by saying they are people from all different walks of life. BoJack then runs into Mr. Peanutbutter who makes his crossover joke and tells BoJack he's just kidding around. Mr. Peanutbutter then tells BoJack he wants to talk to him and then calls out for his friend Erica.
BoJack then meets Diane Nguyen, his ghostwriter. She walks up to him as he is looking over the balcony and she tells him parties make her anxious. She then starts talking about how she was never invited to any parties in high school. She then compliments BoJack on his house and he tells her that after being in a dumb sitcom he might as well get a sweet house out of the deal.
Diane then asks BoJack what he's been working on and he tells her he just sits around his home and complains.
Diane then asks BoJack how that's working out for him and he says he can't really complain. BoJack then sees Mr. Peanutbutter joking around and questions if she knows who that is. Diane then indicates she knows him. BoJack then says his show Mr. Peanutbutter's House about the dog who adopts three human kids was a dumb idea for a sitcom. BoJack then says Mr. Peanutbutter is so stupid that he doesn't realize how miserable he should be.
Diane then asks BoJack if he knows the story of the dad from The Brady Bunch. BoJack then responds he was bringing up three boys of his own. Diane says that's right but the real story is that the guy who played the dad hated being on The Brady Bunch because he thought it was beneath him and he was a real actor. Diane then goes on to say most people don't even get to do The Brady Bunch version of the thing they want to do with their lives. She tells BoJack he is actually in a really good place because he can do whatever he wants and is responsible for his own happiness.
BoJack then says that's depressing and Diane says it isn't. BoJack tells her he can't even be responsible for making his own breakfast. There is then a cut to him struggling to pour cereal in a bowl and calling out to Todd for help. Diane then questions what would make him happy. He tells her he guesses finishing his memoir would make him happy. Diane then says she could help with that.
BoJack then asks if she would really want to, as she would have to spend a lot of time with him and would probably get sick of him. Diane reassures him that won't happen.
The two manage to hit it off well until Diane reveals to BoJack that Mr. Peanutbutter, BoJack's sitcom rival, is her boyfriend after Mr. Peanutbutter walks over to them. BoJack questions this and then says he's really happy for them, while uncontrollably vomiting cotton candy at the revelation that Diane and Mr. Peanutbutter are dating.
|Will Arnett||...||BoJack Horseman|
|Amy Sedaris||...||Princess Carolyn|
|Alison Brie||...||Diane Nguyen / Olivia|
|Paul F. Tompkins||...||Mr. Peanutbutter|
|Aaron Paul||...||Todd Chavez|
|Chris Cox||...||Additional Voices|
|Jon Daly||...||Additional Voices|
|Nicholas Gonzalez||...||Cartel Man|
|Patton Oswalt||...||Charlie Rose / Pinky Penguin / Doctor|
|Kristen Schaal||...||Sarah Lynn|
|J. K. Simmons||...||Lenny Turteltaub|
|Fred Tatasciore||...||Additional Voices|
|Heléne Yorke||...||Additional Voices|
- This episode is one of the two of the seven episodes from the show's original pitch treatment that would actually be made into an episode, the other being BoJack Hates The Troops, which was originally titled BoJack supports the Troops!
- This episode was originally titled "BoJack Throws A Party!," and its plot was almost identical to the finished project.
- There is a reference to The Jerry Lewis Show on the TV.
- The painting shown in the back of BoJack's Office is a reference to a David Hockney painting: Portrait of an Artist (Pool with Two Figures).
- The Wilhelm scream can be heard when some sliding on the floor co-worker accidentally falls out of window Penguin Publishing.
- BoJack and Princess Carolyn are seen standing at a crosswalk in front of a "Lululemming" store, referencing the real-life athletic clothing retailer Lululemon.
- An autograph huntress in a green dress is giving an interview in BoJack the Feminist. In Ruthie, she works at a jewelry store as a sales associate. She also appears in Horse Majeure and Zoës and Zeldas.
- Original Pitch Treatment, BoJack Horseman: The Art Before The Horse