|“||Don't you break my heart BoJack Horseman||”|
—Princess Carolyn, 2007
|“||You know, I don't do the whole "Love" thing. It's either you hurt someone or you end up getting hurt||”|
Best Thing That Ever Happened is the ninth episode of Season 3 of the Netflix original series BoJack Horseman, and the 33rd episode overall. This episode, along with the rest of Season 3, aired on July 22, 2016.
In a flashback from 2007, Princess Carolyn sits in her office reading a newspaper, the front page having scathing reviews of BoJack's new show, The BoJack Horseman Show. He calls her, depressed over his shows bad ratings, and asks her to come over. She reluctantly agrees.
Princess Carolyn arrives at his house and finds it a mess, as he ordered a bunch of pizzas, and drank a lot of alcohol with "happy pills" to make himself feel better.
He regrets doing the show, but Princess Carolyn convinces him that it's "bold and cutting edge," so people just aren’t ready for it.
BoJack says she's right, it's not him that's the problem, but everyone else. He then flirts with Princess Carolyn trying to kiss her, but Princess Carolyn rejects, saying she's his agent. BoJack tells her she's so much more than that, and they make out.
At sunrise the next day, Princess Carolyn, having spent the night with him, sits next to a sleeping BoJack in bed. She tells him "Don’t you break my heart, BoJack Horseman." He wakes up and tells her to be quiet. He then tells her she smells nice, and she simply thanks him.
In 2016, BoJack is at Elefante, waiting impatiently for Princess Carolyn. She arrives and starts rambling about new deals he could get if he gets the Oscar nomination. A stern BoJack says he's not planning on staying long. Just then, Sandro, the waiter, interrupts them. Princess Carolyn begins to stall by talking to him. Sandro says he's nervous because they have a food critic tonight.
After he leaves, Princess Carolyn recognizes that she lost both the Kelsey film, the Pegasus film and the Ethan Around show for him, but she assures him not getting the roles will be the best thing that's ever happened to him. BoJack is obviously not pleased with her failures, and he pulls out note cards, with a speech written on them.
This is a catalyst for a fight between the two of them, based on two decades worth of pent-up frustration.
As soon as BoJack starts delving into his speech, Princess Carolyn quickly excuses herself to the bathroom, lying she has to make a phone call and freaks out. She sneaks over to Sandro and whispers something in his ear. She returns to BoJack, distracting from the conversation, by having the staff bring a cake to celebrate the two of them working together for twenty-three years.
BoJack bluntly tells Princess Carolyn she's fired. However, Sandro misunderstands and thinks he's talking about him and makes a huge scene and insulting BoJack—before walking out of the restaurant. After this, Princess Carolyn continues to talk about business with BoJack, but he repeats that he's firing her.
Princess Carolyn says he'll just be mad at her for two weeks, things will go back to normal, just like every other time. BoJack continues to read from his note cards, but after realizing they got messed up, he concludes that their relationship "no longer has any professional integrity," and he leaves the restaurant.
Princess Carolyn follows him outside and angrily asks him if Ana gave him this idea, but he tells her that she had nothing to do with it. BoJack tells her she screwed up, but Princess Carolyn points out that it was once in twenty-three years.
She goes on to rant about nobody wanted to work with him, also how everyone told her to leave him, but she stayed with him and still got him jobs. Princess Carolyn stayed with BoJack—despite the fact he would always flake, sabotage them, or get wrapped up in some crisis or vague sadness. Princess Carolyn admits that BoJack is right, and then thanks him for firing her. She heads back into the restaurant, but BoJack follows her back inside.
BoJack is pulled aside by a waiter, who shows him an empty kitchen. The waiter tells BoJack, that everyone else quit, the critic is getting impatient; and that he doesn't know what to do. BoJack tells him to do what they normally do and that he's the chef now.
When he exits the kitchen, BoJack finds Princess Carolyn, behind the bar. He rants to her about how she thinks of him as a burden, but she likes fixing him because it makes her feel good about herself, which he never asked for. She angrily says all he's ever done, is make her rescue him, and make her listen to him complain.
BoJack scoffs at her "abuse," and then blurts while mocking her insulting him "BoJack you wasted my thirties!" Princess Carolyn says she never said that, but BoJack claims she said it with her actions, and she makes him feel bad about himself. Princess Carolyn asks if that's the reason he's firing her, and BoJack says it's a lot of reasons. Princess Carolyn walks away.
She is seen back in the bathroom, telling herself it'll be OK. BoJack walks in and tells her this wasn't an easy decision for him, and admits he talked with Ana about it because he values her opinion. This infuriates Princess Carolyn, she tackles BoJack, and they start having a physical fight around the restaurant.
BoJack gets her to stop and tells her that this is what he means by her being unprofessional. She angrily says she'll talk professionalism with him.
They move their conversation to the meat locker. Princess Carolyn angrily tells BoJack he doesn't want professionalism, just "a mommy he can have sex with." BoJack says that he doesn't want to be around her because she makes him feel like a terrible person. She argues back, "[he's] such a self-pitying masochist that she can say ten nice things and one mean thing and he'd only hear the one mean thing." BoJack accepts this challenge.
Princess Carolyn tells him he has a natural charisma, and he's loved by millions, but BoJack scoffs these off.
Meanwhile, the waiter is trying to figure out how to use the kitchen. A customer comes in, to see what's going on, and the waiter recruits her to be a waitress.
Princess Carolyn continues her compliments, saying number six is that he makes her laugh, but BoJack scoffs at this as well. She laughs, and BoJack asks "how [Princess Carolyn] ever put up with him?"
Princess Carolyn says she didn't, she liked being with him, and doesn't regret their relationship.
BoJack says that he's doing this for the both of them. Princess Carolyn asks if he ever loved her, but BoJack tells her that "[he] doesn't do the love thing because you either hurt them or they hurt you." Princess Carolyn says she does this to herself and she doesn't know why. BoJack suggests that when you're good at putting out fires, you just run from fire to fire, without thinking.
Suddenly, the waiter opens the meat locker door and reveals that both himself and the kitchen are on fire. They manage to put the fire out, but everyone has left, due to everything being on fire; except for the food critic—who is still expecting her mushroom risotto. Princess Carolyn says, she knows how to make it, but BoJack tells her to go home. She realizes she should, and tells BoJack good luck. However, she ends up turning her car around back to the restaurant.
When she returns, BoJack says just because she's helping him doesn't mean he's obligated to not fire her, and she retorts back she knows he has no sense of obligation for her. As she makes the risotto, he asks her how she knows how to do this. She reveals her mom was a live-in maid, for a rich family who loved Italian food, but since her mother was an alcoholic—she would often have to cover for her, so they wouldn't be homeless.
BoJack asks why she never told him, she says she has, but she knows he never remembers anything. BoJack claims he remembers the first time they met, she was working for Marv, and when he saw her he thought she was cute, and she said "Hey! It’s nice to see you again!"
This makes BoJack realize this wasn't the first time they met. Princess Carolyn tells him the first time she met him, was when she was still an intern, and she had to drop scripts off at his house. She found him on his front lawn covered in tapioca pudding. Princess Carolyn then hosed him down, dragged him inside, and covered him with a blanket.
BoJack thinks it's impressive she went from the daughter of a maid to the head of her own company. Princess Carolyn says the company isn't doing so great, but BoJack tells her not to guilt him. She tells him it isn't his fault, she didn't realize being an agent and running an agency are two different talents.
He asks why she's an agent at all if it makes her miserable, she says it's what she's good at, and she doesn't know what else she would do. BoJack then tells her, that he does love her, or as much as he is able to love someone.
They serve the critic, but despite liking the risotto, she tells them that she's going to give them a bad rating because she had to wait two hours for her food. However, she's only a critic for a blog on Tumblr, so BoJack kicks her out.
BoJack and Princess Carolyn share a drink at the bar. Princess Carolyn tells BoJack, the second time they met was after a taping of Horsin Around—where Olivia put too much detergent in the washing machine, and Nancy Reagan guest-starred. She went back estate to introduce herself, but BoJack told her he was tired from pretending to be nice all night and to leave him alone.
BoJack says he's a real jerk. Princess Carolyn agrees, but he still has many other great qualities to him, and she lists off multiple of them. For her final compliment, she says he let her help him tonight because he knew she needed it. BoJack says she's a good friend.
Princess Carolyn then begs BoJack to not leave her, to give her six months, and then he can leave, and she'll never ask anything from him again. She asks what he thinks. BoJack says no.
|Will Arnett||...||BoJack Horseman|
|Amy Sedaris||...||Princess Carolyn|
|Alison Brie||...||Samantha The Food Critic|
|Paul F. Tompkins||...||Sandro / Dog Valet|
|Jamie Clayton||...||Lady in Stall / Donkey Mom|
|Barin Vaughn||...||Waiter / Possum at the Bar / Child Donkey|
- At one point the TV in the background can be seen showing the same cute puppy video that Diane was required to watch before her abortion in Brrap Brrap Pew Pew.
- Diane, Mr. Peanutbutter, and Todd are not seen in this episode.
- This is the only episode throughout the whole series where they remain in the same building for the whole episode (excluding the introduction scene, since it was a flashback from 2007).
- Samantha's website is an actual website made by the creators.
- Todd's employees at "Cabracadabra" have all been replaced with orca women.